You Never Know Whose Heart You Will Touch


Today took an unexpected turn. I was heading over to my car with a full night ahead. On my way to my car I was thinking of all the things I had to do tonight, and extremely tight on my time. As I was getting into my car, an elderly woman approached my car. She seemed a bit winded and out of sorts. Rushing up to my car calling “Miss! Miss!”. She was carrying a few bags and exclaimed she was just kicked out on the street and had nowhere to go. She was short on her weekly rent only $30.00 and has not eaten in two days. She asked me if I could give her a ride to the supermarket, as her friend worked there and could lend her some money. She explained to me, she just finished her chemotherapy treatment, and was feeling weak, she could not possibly walk there.

I assisted her into my car, and gave her a ride to the store. The store was not just up the road as she initially said, but how could I leave her in the parking lot. In the car on the way to the store, she shared with me bits and pieces of her life. Her husband had just passed away 7 weeks ago. They were married 32 years after meeting in Sunday School together. Originally from Maryland, she came to New York when their doctor transferred to New York. She said “When you think that is the only way you are going to make it, you do what you have to do.”

She told me about the last memory she shared with her husband, Although he was ill with cancer as well, his health seemed to be improving as he was talking and moving around a bit. He asked her to run to the store to pick up some Pralines & Cream Ice Cream. (She forgot that she had just bought some the night before with a buy 1 get 1 free coupon). When she came home, she found he had passed away.

She did not know anyone in New York, and her daughter back home in Baltimore was paying her medical expenses, She was even taking the train home next week after her last chemotherapy treatment. Her social worker had helped her find housing after her husband passed where she could pay her rent weekly. She shared an apartment with a woman who also was suffering with cancer.

Today, after her chemotherapy treatment, she went home only to find all of her belonging were left on the street because she was short on the rent. Not only had she lost her husband 7 weeks ago, is undergoing chemotherapy, but she was now homeless. She lifted up her wig and showed me her thin hair, and said she has lost most of her hair since beginning the Chemo.

She began searching through her bag looking for her phone and pulled out a plastic bowl. She said that was her bowl she carries with her if she got sick, because the medicine had made her very sick. She said she had not eaten in 2 days because she only had 6 pennies to her name. She had pain medicine she could take but cannot take it on an empty stomach and she was in a great deal of pain.

My heart was breaking, and felt my eyes filled with tears. She had struggled with her speech and as she was crying, had gotten herself so upset she was stuttering on her words. I talked to her a bit and tried to calm her down, reminding her she will be back with her family in just another week. All she needed to do was get through this last week and she would be reunited with her family back in Maryland.

When we got to the supermarket where her friend worked, she was so scared I was going to leave her there. I promised her I would be waiting when she leaves the store. After she went into the store, and knowing I had no cash on me, I went into the store to go to the ATM. Not knowing if her friend was giving her money or not, I planned to give her the $40. I figured it covered the rent, and would have money left over for food. When I returned to the car, she was already there waiting for me, crying. She started to me tell me she did not know where she would sleep tonight and just wanted to go home. It was so hard to compose myself, and not cry myself. I gave her the $40.00. She was so happy she just kept saying how she was not going to have to sleep outside tonight. She asked to borrow my phone to call the place she was staying to let them know she had gotten the money together. (She only had til 6pm, and the woman was going out-of-town – it was now 5:15)

She asked if I could bring her back to the apartment so she could give the money to the woman where she was renting the room. So we drove back to the apartment, and she dropped off the money, We met the deadline of 6pm, and now she could go pick up her belonging that were left at the police station. She said when they kicked her out, they left her belongings at the police station? (the story was starting to not make sense)

We headed over to the police station, as soon as we got there she jumped out of the car, thanked me and was on her way. I sat in the car surprised and reflective. So many thoughts running through my mind…. If she was picking up her belongings and they were truly left at the precinct, how would she get them back home? Why did she not need a ride back to her apartment where she was staying? Something just did not feel right, but I could not put my finger on it.

When I drove away, I was feeling torn, On one hand, her story moved me so much and she was so emotional, how could I even begin to second guess everything she told me? What kind of person was I? But I could not help but feel in my gut, something did not feel right.

Then my phone rang.

It was the number I had dialed for her just less than an hour ago. A younger man on the other end of the phone, aggressively asking …. WHO IS THIS? …. WHY DID YOU CALL MY PHONE? …. WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME? And then proceeded to curse me out for calling his phone. I did not even mention, that it was for this elderly woman who had just lost her apartment. After all this number, was supposed to be the other older woman she was sharing an apartment with?

I have accepted, I will never know. In my heart on the moment, I did the right thing. I will always be left wondering, what happened to her? Was her story real? Is it possible it was simply drug money and I contributed to her habit?

I choose to believe I helped her.

My Personal Story : How Coaching Changed My Life and Set Me FREE

Originally written October 2012


Empower Life Coach

I was at what felt like the “peak of my life” in 2007-2008. Everything was going great, and I was loving life. Things were falling into place like I had never seen before. I was traveling frequently, going to the gym 5 days a week, dancing and living it up -feeling better than I ever did before. My body was so fit, energy-off the charts, and I was constantly challenging my endurance and bringing myself to higher levels of fitness.

I injured my ankle during a move in late 2008 which changed everything. I thought it was just an ordinary ankle sprain, which it wasn’t. I had torn ligaments as well. I decided to take it easy and let it heal. Each time it seemed to be healed or feeling better, I re-injured it.  Year by year, I started losing who I am at heart. Things that were fun to me became a challenge and painful.



Was I being judged by others or is it the pain I inflicted upon myself?


I have gone through periods of frustration, sadness and emptiness. You may be thinking – oh its just your ankle there are worse things out there, you still have your health right? Wrong. Since I stopped doing all the things I loved, I gained weight. This was a catch 22 for me. Now I have more pressure on my ankle having gained weight, but cannot lose the weight to take it off because I cannot exercise.


I recently began to look at things differently. It did not happen overnight but it was a long process to builder my inner strength. The time was not right before for me to take care of the surgery, and I do not regret going sooner. My mind and heart was not in the right place. I am not getting surgery just to alleviate the pain. It is so much bigger than that. My motto in this process is “I am taking my life back”



Unconditional love from my peers reminded me who I am at heart


During my extensive training program through Coaching for Transformation, I not only studied to be a coach, but was coached myself. You cannot be in the mindset of helping others without looking at yourself first. My teachers and fellow peers became a second family for me. We had such deep support and love for one another, giving each other the strength, courage, and support to make it through our toughest times. In the class and through peer coaching, we built a bond of trust and shared our deepest secrets with one another free of judgment. I am so thankful to have this opportunity, I write this with tears of complete gratitude.

How often in your life have you walked into a room of strangers that show you nothing but love and open their hearts unconditionally?



Through my personal transformation, I took time to look at my aspects of my life. The biggest thing that gets in my way right now is my ankle. Many people may just say what took you so long, but it was more than just getting surgery.  There was an emotional aspect of it as well.


I hit rock bottom emotionally and was crying out in pain. I lost who I was.

I think often about a time in class I shared with my peers (specifically Cathy). I felt so deeply connected to her that day as I shared one of my deep personal secrets. We were practicing a specific technique of coaching through visualization. In this process I closed my eyes and let go of our standard ways of thinking and set myself free to experience the journey.  I remember talking about how much I hated my legs right now and how they felt heavy on my body like tree trunks.This is a pretty deep statement can you imagine feeling this way? My whole body became heavy, I felt tears come down my cheeks uncontrollably as I described how I felt trapped in my body and helpless.

Let’s take a step back for a moment.  I would like to share with you the drastic change in the perception I had in myself. I had always loved my legs, I got compliments all the time on them prior to this. I can recall one of my friends who used to tell me how he and his buddies would sit and talk about women and rank them… They had my legs listed on top. I was not insulted at all. I took it as a compliment and laughed. Suddenly this was becoming part of my past and no longer who I am. I had a hard time with that. Some may say that sounds superficial, but is it? It went way deeper than not getting those same compliments anymore, it began to change who I was. So I questioned myself Who am  I ?


Photo Copyright 2010 Studio 588; Used with permission

Now that you see where I am coming from … let’s go back to that day during coaching. I was seeing my legs as tree trunks planted into the ground and immobile. (Yes drastic, but that is how extreme it felt to me that I was no longer working out, dancing, hiking, walking freely, or enjoying life) As I continued to see my legs as tree trunks everything around the tree changed and suddenly I was in quick sand, sinking.  I had no control over what was happening, and I was sinking slowly deeper and deeper.

Looking back, I would say the feeling of sinking into quicksand is feeling stuck and helpless.


I suddenly was re adapting my life to a stagnant and boring lifestyle. Initially I had no choice because of course it had to heal. Now looking back and looking at what is really going on, it was an excuse. You are absolutely correct, I could have had this surgery earlier and been back on my feet but for whatever reason, it didn’t feel like an option for me.

What ran through my mind was:

  • Who will help me?
  • What will my job say? Will I get fired?
  • How long will I have to take off?
  • How will I pay my bills?
  • How long will I not be able to walk?
  • What if they mess up the surgery?
  • Physical therapy is very expensive, what if I can’t afford it?
  • What if I am worse off than I started?

F.E.A.R can change how we view everything, and what we perceive can be devastating,

Knowing what I know now, although some of these are valid concerns, it is just fear. I have learned through my studies how the mind can change how we perceive things and create problems that are not really there. What I know now is it is time to get my life back. I want to follow my passions and set myself free to “LIVE THE LIFE I DESERVE!”  Ironically, this slogan is on all of my papers, materials, and advertising for my business Empower Life Coach. I shared these wonderful secrets with my clients and watched people transform, but I didn’t take the time to remember myself in the process. This journey is what makes me who I am today and I am stronger because of it. You don’t appreciate what is just handed to you, but the discovery in the struggle is the gift to yourself.


All I needed was to ask MYSELF for help. No-one was in my way, but me.

Revisiting again that one special day I had that I shared in class with my peers. I remember when Cathy asked me, as I was sinking into the quicksand … what if you raised your hand up for a moment? As I sat there with my eyes closed sobbing as I saw myself sinking into the ground helplessly, I built the courage and strength to reach my hand slowly out of the quicksand. She asked what that meant to me, as the tears had stopped I said I am going to ask for help. I do not need to be in this alone. I started to feel that there are options, although I did not know yet what they were at the time.




I will overcome.


What I have discovered is I did not need help from anyone else, I needed help from myself. I will no longer allow myself to sabotage my dreams. Over the past year I have met some amazing people in my life and learned of many people’s struggles and how they overcame them. I see the strength in others around me now in myself. It was there all along, I just did not know it.




The night I walked on FIRE changed my life forever

Being an avid follower of Tony Robbins, I know this also has impacted my life. Attending the UPW event in March of 2012, has soared my life into placed I never dreamed imaginable. From the moment I stepped into the room, I felt energy like I never felt before. It exceeded the highest adrenaline rush you can ever imagine. I knew from the moment I walked across fire on the first night, life would never be the same. I watched transformation happen right in front of me and through me.  I have to say I almost missed that night, and was reminded by my friend John how it changed his life. Seeing how hr bounced back from what most would say one of the most tragic stories I have heard I knew I could not pass up this opportunity. Often John’s kind words pushed me along, just when I did not think it was possible. I truly believe God sent him as my angel to watch over me at that time. He was “just a facebook acquaintance”, who has become what will probably be a lifelong friend. I have always believed everyone crosses your path for a reason.

We are all given opportunity to be whoever we want to be. Some have a deeper fight than others. Maybe some detours have come into my path, but I know now that this is the right time for me and I wouldn’t change a thing.


I am ready to relcaim my life!


What do I think now, as I approach my surgery tomorrow morning? (October 2012)


  • I am reclaiming my life back
  • I can’t wait to start these new chapter of my life
  • I am ready to live my life and follow my life purpose
  • I am strong and empowered
  • I have planned for this surgery and it will work out
  • I am confident after this surgery, I will be stronger and healthier than ever before.
  • I am fully prepared. Everything is planned. I am READY!




As an update to my original note I wrote in October 2012, it is great to reflect back at what I was feeling at that time and see how far I have come. A colleague recently reminded me of how powerful this note was.  It feels so long ago, I forgot about this journey and struggle. I believe it is important to reconnect to the pain and struggle we are faced with to appreciate how far we have come and to encourage us to go even farther.


I would like to share with you where I am now both on an emotional and physical level. Emotionally I feel strong, fulfilled and living a life of purpose. I have overcome some obstacles, and I am thrilled to be moving forward in a positive direction. I appreciate the darkness now I have experienced as it reminds me how important our state of mind can affect our lives. I see absolutely that I could have started the healing process sooner, but the lesson I have walked away with you cannot put a price tag on. Life has taught me to be strong, believe, and that “It is ok” to not be “ok”.

Physically I still have difficult days so I have learned to pace my exercise while I build strength. Over the past few years while looking for alternatives to loose weight I starting looking into raw foods. I am not 100% raw yet, I find it hard in the cold weather, but I am healthy and have found this to be a wonderful substitute for igniting my energy. I feel alive, focused, and embrace life.

I ask you the same thing what have you learned from your struggle? We all have one, but what is important is the gift behind it. 

Thank you to my fellow CFT graduated & leaders, My friends and all who have supported me through this incredible TRANSFORMATION. I feel right now I can truly say, My name is Amanda Scocozzo and I am a certified life coach specializing in PERSONAL EMPOWERMENT.  I help people LIVE THE LIFE THEY DESERVE!


“Dedicated to my peers of CFT 2011 & my friend John R.& Marni”