Often, we find ourselves wanting to fit in and please others. We worry about what others are saying or thinking about us. The desire to fit in is not just a problem faced in the teenage years, although it is the one we most often hear about. Do you remember what the first day of school was like, not knowing anyone, sitting alone? What did you do to fit in? At that moment, people often sacrifice part of themselves or values just to “fit in”.
We do not even fully acknowledge that struggle, as common as it is. Many young people believe that when they do things to please their peers, such as drink when they shouldn’t, or behave and party in inappropriate ways, they will be popular and liked. They go against the advice of their parents or their own common sense only to find themselves in trouble and not accomplishing what they set out to do. We as a society, brush it off and call it “the teenage years” or “growing pains”. So because it is brushed off when we are children or growing up, is it ever discussed in it’s entirety? I know I can speak for myself, I just figured it out as I went along, no one gave me tools or an easy way out.
- It is natural for us to crave the desire to fit in, but at what expense?
- As an adult are you holding true to who you are?
- Do you take the time to even find yourself and WHO YOU ARE?
- Are you living your life for others, and forgetting about your needs?
- Do you follow your own mind, or are you influenced greatly by those around you to please them?
When you do things that are not genuine or a reflection of the real you, you will not be happy with yourself and will end up confused. You’ll be confused because you won’t know whom to please, or how. Self-respect comes from being true to who you really are and from acting in accordance with your Authentic Self.
Tips How to Be True to Yourself
- When you know and love yourself, it is effortless to be true to yourself.
- Have the courage to accept yourself as you are, and not who others want you to be.
- Do not pretend to be someone you are not, just to gain acceptance of others.
- Respect yourself, others will respect you. They will sense that you are strong and capable of standing up for yourself and your beliefs.
- When you are true to yourself, you allow your individuality and the TRUE YOU will shine through.
- Take the time to discover your highest values and aspirations. Stay true to them, and hold them dear to your heart.
- Listen to your inner voice, that feeling you have and follow your intuition.
- Don’t let your wounds transform you into someone you are not.
- Surround yourself with people who make you happy, and not that you feel you need to impress.
- As Dr Suess Eloquently Says: “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
If you struggle with finding your authentic voice, contact me for a free consultation:
Amanda Scocozzo, C.P.C.
(347) 913-LIFE (5433)